Debra Galant, who writes from New Jersey for the New York Times, has a blog in which she explains the universe. Here’s an Onionesque take on the subject of “Open Heart Fundraisers.”
WUTEGGSIT, N.J. — The Wuteggsit PTA was devastated today to learn that its spring open-heart surgery fundraiser will be cancelled because of threatened lawsuit by a major New Jersey hospital trade group.
?This is so upsetting,? said Mandi Rosenbaum, chairwoman of the event. ?The kids have been looking forward to this for weeks.? Rosenbaum is just one of a dozen mothers who had been training to perform open heart surgery at the ?Open Your Heart? capital campaign event scheduled for February.
A single cardiac surgery can bring in $25,000 in fees. ?That?s a year?s worth of library books, special assemblies and juice for class parties,? Rosenbaum said. ?Now what are we going to do? Hold a bake sale??
She includes Prints the Chaff in her links rail, so I’m returning the honor.
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