TV news truisms

From Steve Safran at Lost Remote (nod to BuzzMachine for the link), who offers a ton of eternal truths that seem strikingly familiar to the stuff we see every day.

THE LAW OF NEWS CONSPIRACIES

Those who believe there is a “giant media conspiracy” have never seen three producers try to agree what to get on a pizza.


LAW OF REPORTING

Producers will always give you 15 seconds less than you need to tell the story.


RESTATEMENT OF THE LAW OF REPORTING

Reporters will always take 15 seconds more than they need.


THE THREEFOLD LAW OF NEWS EXPERIENCE

You will never get done paying your dues. You will always think your managers are nuts. You will never work in a market you can afford to live in.


THE “VIEWERS ARE OUR CONSULTANTS” POSTULATE

You can’t affect change at your station. But if you send an anonymous email to the station suggesting the same change, it will occur.


HEISENBERG’S UNCERTAINTY PRINCIPLE, APPLIED TO NEWS

The time between an employee’s hire, and their complaint they are underpaid, is too small to be measured accurately.