Food is not safe as long as you pick it up within five seconds of its hitting the floor. From snopes.com:
Drop a cookie onto a clean floor, and you could eat it with impunity. Drop it onto a contaminated one, and it matters not how quickly you pick it up. And, short of swabbing where the cookie landed and culturing samples taken from those swabs to see what grows, there’s no way to tell safe from hazardous. What looks pristine can be a bacterial smorgasbord because germs aren’t visible to the naked eye. It’s ironic: that which which has taken the greatest number of human lives throughout history is something we can’t see.
Wow, another great nitpicking opportunity: How many times does this have to be pounded into people’s heads: Irony is not merely an unusual or unexpected outcome. It is an outcome that is the opposite of the original intent. If there is no original intent, there can be no irony. If the experiment to prove the the five-second rule is valid actually poisons the experimenter, that is irony. Or to put it in real news terms: if, say, somebody parachutes off a high cliff to protest a ban on such cliff jumping and is killed when her chute doesn’t open, that is irony. Most of the time irony falls under the show-don’t-tell rule. You don’t need to tell somebody something is ironic. Just write your sentence to dramatize the irony and leave it at that.